Coley's friendship has made it easier to keep my promise of "open adoption". (it almost seems like Coley and I were sisters seperated at birth) Unfortunately my daughter's birthmom doesn't keep in as good of touch with us as Coley does. Though we encourage her too. N.'s (my daughter)birthmom is much more limited socially and economically and we ofetn have to look for her to arrange visits. N is now 91/2 and loves to see or talk to her birthmom. It is sad that the birthmom is not as eager. I've tried to figure out the reasons but can't seem to get any clear answer. I pray that eventually she will show an interest in getting to know N. better. N. does know that her birthmom chose a better life for her than she could provide at the time. We've explained to N. that her birthmom loved her enough to give her more than she would have been able to give her. Our son's birthmom is aware of this and is sensitive to n. we really appriciate this. N. gets cards and gifts from coley too. N. sees this as a gift of love from someone very special in our lives that allowed her to have a "kid brother". This may perhaps be just as special to her later in life as if her natural birthmom stayed in touch. God has a way of working all things out. Thanks Coley!