Who *is* this new blogger? (an introduction)

Those who know me—in my offline life and on forums, including those here at Adoption.com—know that I have a lot to say, always, on almost any topic, but that open adoption is a subject near and dear to my heart. So I’m quite pleased to be writing this post today, introducing myself as a new blogger for AdoptionBlogs.com, writing on open adoption.

But before I dive in—a brief introduction of some of the characters you’ll meet in this space. My name is Meghann, and I’ve been married to my wonderful husband, George, for almost twelve years. We decided when we got married that twenty-seven or twenty-eight seemed like the perfect age to start a family—we would be “settled,” with a home, stable careers, maybe a few pets, and we’d be ready to be the parents we wanted to be. We couldn’t imagine then the direction life would take us—a brief detour through fertility treatments followed by adoption classes, home studies, background checks, profiles, and the long wait, all the while hoping someone, someday would choose us to be parents. But that was the path we took, and here we are now: parents, in open adoption, to a beautiful daughter who is the light of our lives.

JellyBean is the nickname my brother made up for my daughter, and that’s the name I’ll use for her here. We celebrated her first birthday last week, and we can’t remember now what our life was like before she came into it. Her first mother, D, chose us to be her parents just a few days before she was born, and over the past year D has likewise become a part of our family.

They say that no matter how prepared you think you are to become a parent, you’re never truly prepared—there’s a huge learning curve, and however much you’ve read and planned and thought about it, all the training comes on the job. This is doubly so for parenting in open adoption: There is a wealth of research available detailing the benefits of open adoption, and adoptive parents—just like all parents—daydream about life with their future children, but all the reading and talking and daydreaming in the world doesn’t prepare you for actually navigating complex open adoption relationships. Real experience is, as always, the best teacher—but even in the midst of it, I’m still daydreaming: imagining family times together with D and picturing how JellyBean’s own relationship with her first mother will develop in the years to come.

For me, the last year has been the beginning of a crash-course in parenting in open adoption—I’ve learned quite a lot, but I know there is still much to learn. I hope you’ll come along for the ride, reading and sharing your own thoughts on whatever topics come up, so that we can learn from each other’s experiences.

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