In yesterday’s positive and negative posting, I discussed the negatives of the moments I have missed. To be quite honest, it was depressing to write. I am well aware of the moments I have missed but it’s not my personality to focus on the negative things in life. That doesn’t mean that I am unaware of them or don’t hurt as a result of them, I just try not to focus on them and prefer to keep them in the back of my mind and not the forefront.

Today, though, it’s the turn for the positive post so in “piggyback” style I want to talk about the moments I haven’t missed. Because of open adoption, there are moments that I haven’t missed. It’s true the moments that I have missed are probably far greater than the moments I’ve been there for, but every minute I am with Charlie is a treasured memory and a blessing.

I’ve been able to see him on each and every actual birthday. Not just the weekend of his birthday, but his actual, real, he-was-born-on-this-date birthday! I can’t tell you how much that means to me. This past birthday I was a little worried that I wouldn’t be able to see him on his actual birthday and since that was our tradition and what I’m used to, I was a little upset about the possibility. When I mentioned my fears to A. she quickly calmed them and let me know I have a standing date with Charlie on his actual birthday until he is old enough to say spending birthdays with both his Moms is not cool!

I have Christmas memories with him. They are not on actual Christmas day, but usually sometime either right before or right after Christmas. We exchange gifts and usually have some hot chocolate and cookies or something festive.

Then there are the very treasured moments from the field trip that I went on with Charlie and his class – something I never thought I would be able to do with Charlie. Other treasured moments include reading him stories, playing cars with him (we love to play cars together!), helping him cut up his food, watching his slurp spaghetti just like my Daddy, listening to him tell me jokes, singing with him, snuggling and loving on him, and just being with him and his family.

We have had many moments together; some are little and some are big, but they are all precious just the same.

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Other Positives and Negatives in my NaBloPoMo Series:
Positive: Visits
Negative: Hearing Him Call Someone Else Mom
Positive: My Relationship with Charlie's Adoptive Parents
Negative: Moments Missed

Photo Credit: Coley Strickland