The other day I ran into a friend and fellow adoptive mom and we had a short conversation about our children and adoption. My friend shared that she was aware that I now blog here adoptionblogs.com about open adoption, and that she thought what I am doing sounded very interesting, although she had never actually read anything I have written. Oh? I wondered aloud why she had not ventured here long enough to catch a post or two, and her response I admit surprised me a bit.

“Well, we do not have open adoptions, so that information isn’t really for us.”

This comment left me scratching my head. While I know that not everyone is involved in an open adoption, and those who are have varying degrees of contact, communication, and even perspective, isn’t the bulk of the information here something anyone, involved in any aspect of adoption could really learn from?

I am not a birthmother, but I have learned a great from reading what Jenna, Coley, and Jan Baker have had to share. Their perspectives, while not my own, have helped me to grow a larger understanding of adoption in general, and great empathy for my own children’s birthfamilies. I read because what they have to share, while different, can change how I view my own experience.

I am not an adoptee, but that is my children’s journey. I know Abby has opened my eyes to what my children might experience, and at times it has comforted me to know that an adopted person can feel happy, satisfied and grow into well rounded person. Hearing about the ways that my own children may (or may not) feel about their own journey helps me make more compassionate decisions for them. This information might not really be about “me”, but how much I am aware definitely effects how I raise my family.

I also venture to every other blog here from time to time. Even if the international, older parent, foster adoption, special needs, China, or Jewish tags do not fit my informational need, I think they often provide me with a much larger picture, and better knowledge of the whole adoption community. Knowing other people who might share the basic connector of adoption, but are vastly different in other ways, I find is very empowering and unifying. Unity and understanding is something the adoption community desperately needs.

Oh, I am not angry with my friend, and she is a great mom, but my info here isn’t for her? Nonsense! Anyone can come away with something eye opening, encouraging, or informative from any number of the great blogs here. I speak about open adoption, shaded through my own unique involvement, but everyone who is interested is welcome to participate. I am not trying to persuade others that mine is the only, or the best way to view adoption, I am also here learning from You, my readers.

There are so many layers to the experience of adoption, I truly believe that all of us can find something of value in almost anyone’s perspective. Yes, open adoption is spoken here, but everyone is welcome to participate, learn , and help educate.


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