With all the information out there for adult adoptees seeking to access original birth records when searching for birthparents, I thought it would be good to discuss how having access in an open adoption can benefit your child and their rights to their own information.
It might not sound like a big deal, getting a copy of your adopted child’s original birth certificate, after all you may already know all the information that it would show anyway. For many adoptees however, one of the most stinging realities of being an adopted person lies in the denial of your basic right to access your own personal information, like your un-amended original birth certificate. You might think about that simple paper at some point during your life and when you are finally an adult and still have to appear before the court to get permission to actually “see” it, it can be a humiliating experience.
As adoptive parents securing a copy of that information, before the adoption is finalized, can be one of the most supportive and caring things we can do for our child. Both an original birth certificate and the one amended upon adoption work together to tell your child’s complete story of where he came from and who he is as a cherished member of your family. In my opinion they do not compete with each other, or one rule the other out. They complement each other to fully tell your child’s journey.
Before an adoption is finalized there is generally a window of time when you can apply for a copy of the original, un-amended birth certification. Of course you will need to have the general information to fill out an application like the full names of the birthmother (birthfather if he is listed), the place of birth, date, time, and name given the child at birth. It is easiest to go to your state’s main health and vital statistics office in person, rather than attempt to work by mail, phone, or even with your local health office. A lot of times the smaller local offices will only issue a shorter version of the birth certificate and not the standard full form. It will also be easier to catch and request to correct mistakes if you are already in person applying at the main office where such things are usually addressed anyway.
This very thing happened to us when we went to get a copy of our son’s original. His birth last name was misspelled in one location and we needed to have the office submit a request to the hospital registrar to correct the error. If we had not been so vigilant our son (having the correct info) may never have been able to locate his original information when he became an adult, because it would not have matched spellings! Because she had already signed surrenders, our son’s birthmother was not able to obtain a copy of this birth certification herself so we were able (once they fixed the spelling) to purchase a copy for her records as well. Of course six months later when we finalized our son’s adoption we were able to then apply for his amended certificate, showing his new name, and listing us as his parents.
It always amazes me when I suggest to new adoptive parents that this is a wonderful thing they can do for their child, to get a copy of that original record, and I am met with a blank stare.
Having that original document does not take away anything from who you are in relation to your child. You are still his or her parents. It’s my belief that your willingness to follow through and get your child a copy of this important first record will show them later just how much you truly love and respect all aspects of who they are.
My son does not have an orginal birth certificate. Here we have to pay to for that and quite a few mothers do not bother with it until they need it, usually for school or traveling.
We were able to do this for our children adopted from foster care. Foster care is required to give a copy of the original birth cert to the adoption worker. However, the adoption worker almost never will give a clear copy to the parents for confidentiality reasons. However, if you request it while the foster care worker still has the case, almost always will she send one. (We were “clued in” to this by our first fostercare caseworker for our first adopted children.)
I totally agree with you about the importance of getting an “unadopted birth certificate” for your child if at all possible. Not all of my children have one. But, for the ones that do, I notice a definite difference in the way they are able to view themselves as a “complete person” and not only an “adopted kid”, if that makes any sense…
Great post, Deb! I know so many adult adoptees who are so frustrated not to be able to have their OBC. Even after reunion, neither adoptees or birth parents can get them in most states if the adoption was closed.
In Washington state, birth mothers can get an unofficial copy if they have all the info necessary, and I got my son’s. Of course, my son has no interest in it! Go figure!
No birth certificate here. Not pleased about it.
I have a copy of the OBC but errors on it and NOT at all pleased about that.
Thanks for all the interesting comments!
Theresa thanks for the added info too, I did not know that.
We’ve got the “unofficial” keepsake birth certificate from the hospital for our birthdaughter as well as the original copies of the paperwork I filled out for the birth certificate. We’ve also got multiple copies of the court document confirming that Jeff was her father, which has all the same information.
When a time comes and she’s older I plan to share these with her. Though one of us will have to make do with copies, because that “unofficial” BC is rather precious to me.
Great website…
Cool post, I really enjoyed reading it. I will check out your site for some more content on this subject….