As birthmothers we all need support. And sometimes our husbands or significant others can be a good support system. Let me tell you about mine...

I met my now husband, J, while I was pregnant, only I didn’t yet know that I was pregnant. (Didn’t find out I was pregnant until I was five and half months along) When I found out how far along I was, I tried to break up with J so I could figure out what to do on my own. But he wouldn’t stand for it.

He wasn’t pushy or anything – he just said that we had something special and he would stick by me. I didn’t think to do much research or look for birthmothers online, so J became my rock as I made my adoption plan.

He came with me to every doctor’s appointment, met Charlie’s adoptive parents with me, and was just supportive of my decision (any decision, not just adoption). He was there holding my hand when I had my c-section, dressed in cute scrubs I might add! He was the one who walked out of the operating room with Charlie. He held me while I cried right after I signed the papers. He was just amazing!

We got engaged about three months after Charlie was born and married a year and a half later. He has continued to be very supportive, attending Charlie’s birthday parties and visits with me, helping me through those first few months, and continually helping me through the rough and emotional days.

Of course, sometimes he doesn’t know exactly what to say and I realize that he doesn’t totally “get it.” It being all the emotions that goes along with being a birthmom. But that is ok. He tries.

He’s also been incredibly supportive of my work with BirthMom Buds. He has been encouraging and proud. If I’m in the shower or something and he answers my phone that happens to be a birthmom call, he is so sweet. Once I came out of the shower and heard him telling an expectant mom to eat saltines before getting out of bed to try and help her nauseous! Too sweet!

I thank God everyday for leading my soul mate to me. And such a supportive and understanding one!