Siblings – aren’t they important in one’s life? Surely you have fond memories of your brother pulling your hair or your sister hogging the bathroom.

Regardless of how well you got along with your sibling(s), you were connected. Adoption can complicate that connection. Children may not really understand the connections since adoptive and birth families are unlike all the other typically families out there.

One of the reasons open adoption was so important to me is the fact that I wanted Noah and Charlie to be able to know one another and to know that they are siblings. But it’s complicated. Being separated by adoption, they do not live together so there chances for bonding are more limited, but bonding is still possible. It requires work and commitment from both the birth parents) and the adoptive family.

Below are some ways that you can build the bond between siblings you are separated by adoption.

• If the siblings are not only separated by adoption, but also separated by miles and visits are not too frequent, keep pictures of the siblings around. You could not only have a few around the house (in the child’s bedroom is a good idea) but also create a special photo album that only has photos of the sibling.



• Also encourage the children to write one another if separated by miles.


• Allow them the opportunity to talk on the phone.



• When visiting, give the children some time to play together and get to know one another.



• Talk about your child’s sibling in between visits.



• Let your child pick out Christmas and birthday gifts for his/her sibling.



• When your child does something that is similar to his or her sibling, tell him or her!

Again, it does take a little work, but it will typically benefit both the children.

Related Posts:
Still Siblings but Separated by Adoption: A Birthmom’s Point of View
Still Siblings but Separated by Adoption