Being a birthmother and dealing with all the emotions that go with it on a daily basis, is not an easy task, yet even on our darkest of days, we can at least find a few things to be grateful for such as the last scoop of chocolate chip ice cream in your fridge or your fuzzy bunny slippers on a cold winters night. As Thanksgiving draws near, many of us give a little bit of thought to things we are thankful for, but why should we limit that to just this time of year. Use this Thanksgiving season to jump start a “gratitude journal” and then continue it through out the upcoming... more

With Thanksgiving pending, I have been going over all that I have to be thankful for here, and I am truly fortunate it is really a long list. One of the little things is that thankfully I won’t be cooking the turkey dinner tomorrow (a relief to all who know me), but there are also many, more important things I consider at this time every year.

I am thankful for a caring, supportive husband who works hard to provide for us all. Without him I would have never known that healing from the chaos that was my childhood was possible. I am immensely thankful for... more

Today has been a difficult one for me. Feeling under the weather, a balmy 75 today, expected to become a blustery 40 tomorrow, is just one small portion of the scenario though. Loss, and the losses we face as mothers, any kind of mothers, is yet another difficulty on my mind today.

Today is the birthday of my little nephew who passed away in 2000. He would have been 10 years old. His loss has me thinking about how mothers deal with the loss of a child be it through, death, or adoption, or the unrealized... more

Since Thanksgiving is this week (ack, where did time go?) I will be doing a few posts related to this holiday in the days that lead up to Thanksgiving.

This Thanksgiving season, be sure and give thanks for your child and let him or her know that you are thankful for them. I’m sure that your child probably knows that he or she is very loved by you, but go out of your way to do so in honor of the holiday. If you have waited too late to send something specifically to or for your child, you could do something in honor of them.

Send your child a card or an e-card... more

Well as I talked about in yesterdays post, I was busy doing my reading at the local library of the book “Forever Fingerprints” by Sherrie Eldridge, and now I will describe about how that did, or did not, go over.

We arrived early, set up chairs and colorful floor pillows for the kids to sit on. I tied the provided balloons on all the chairs. I arranged a display of adoption related books on a center table (the facility has some rather slim pickins here.) Then I waited for the crowds... more

In yesterdays post, I discussed the negative aspect of my family loosing a family member. I really didn’t realize before signing those papers how much relinquishment would affect not just me but everyone in our family.

However, a positive aspect of open adoption is the fact that my family members have the ability to have a relationship with Charlie. Granted it’s not the normal type of relationship that they would have had with Charlie had I parented him, but it’s still a relationship.... more

Early in the morning I am off to the local library to present a reading of author Sherrie Eldridge’s new adoption book, “Forever Fingerprints” in honor of National Adoption Day. Normally our family would simply spend the day together, but the opportunity to share this great book with others in the community was to good to pass up.

I am very excited about how EMK press, the books publisher, has also donated a copy to the library, as well as many other libraries, churches,... more

One of the negative aspects of open adoption (again, this will work for all types of adoption) is that my whole family has lost a member of their extended biological family.

While I was pregnant, I mainly thought about what I was going to loose and the fact that I was going to loose the privilege of mothering one of my children. I didn’t give a whole lot (or any really) of thought to the fact that my family would be loosing a family member as well. It’s sometimes as if we have lost a person who should be sitting at our holiday dinner table.

My parents have lost the... more

My number one tip? Be prepared to find out you’re wrong, about everything, according to someone you will meet anyway. At the very least you may find that you do not know as much as you might have thought. Tip number two, develop your thick skin right now, because the online world of adoption is not a warm and fuzzy place.

When we first became a family by way of adoption, I was somewhat content to just live in my own little world, and deal with the issues unique to our own family and the birthfamilies of our children. For a long time I did not feel the need to look online... more

Charlie actually made this little turkey last year at school but I didn’t get it till Thanksgiving was long gone. It is the first piece of artwork of Charlie’s that I have been given. I pulled it out since Thanksgiving is so close!

This is no ordinary or plain turkey! On each one of the turkey’s many colorful feathers, as part of a homework assignment (since when do kindergartners have homework) Charlie’s Mom had to help him write down one thing he was thankful for on each feather.

I don’t know how clear the picture is or if you can read all the things Charlie is... more