Extended Birth-Families Need to Heal Too
This post is an addition to my last post entitled "Hook Me Up To Some Electrodes, I'm ready for adoption..."
Our second adoption was night and day different from our first adoption when it came to the birthfathers. In our first adoption, he did nothing but cause trouble. He paid no attention at all to the baby that was about to be born all through the pregnancy, and then after we’d had the baby in our home for a month, he decided to cause a ruckus. We later found out that the ruckus began after his mom found out that he’d fathered a child. Anyway, when our second adoption rolled around, Caleb, the birthfather, did want to be part of things. Let… [more]
My Son’s Mother
I learned so much from my son’s mother. She became everything to him that I could not. She gave him bottles, baseballs and band uniforms. She also gave him my love. She didn’t just love him for herself – she loved him for both of us. She made sure he knew not only the depths of her love, but mine as well. She understood and respected the fact that his life began with me, but continued with her.
It’s because of this respect, understanding and love that my son’s mother showed, to not only me, but him over the years that Joseph has grown into a strong, self-assured young man who holds none of the fog that others wade in about their adoptions… [more]
New Blogger, Old Story
While I am new to this blogging community (and very excited to join the team!), my story has been years in the making so I'll start this relationship by sharing a bit of it...
I was fortunate enough to be among those first pioneers for open adoption. I didn't even know this until about seven years ago when I set out to write my memoir and did some research. At the time all I knew was that I was pregnant, 20 years old, with no birth father around and no job. And even though I had begun talking with a counselor at Catholic Charities about the adoption choice, one thing held me back: there was no way I could say goodbye… [more]
Who *is* this new blogger? (an introduction)
Those who know me—in my offline life and on forums, including those here at Adoption.com—know that I have a lot to say, always, on almost any topic, but that open adoption is a subject near and dear to my heart. So I’m quite pleased to be writing this post today, introducing myself as a new blogger for AdoptionBlogs.com, writing on open adoption. But before I dive in—a brief introduction of some of the characters you’ll meet in this space. My name is Meghann, and I’ve been married to my wonderful husband, George, for almost twelve years. We decided when we got married that twenty-seven or twenty-eight seemed like the perfect age to start a family—we would be “settled,” with a home, stable careers, maybe a few pets, and we’d be ready… [more]
Things I Wish I Had Known (adoption carnival)
This is (a very belated) part of the first Adoption Carnival, hosted at Grown in My Heart. It's a pretty big topic: What did people forget to tell you about adoption? What did they omit or conveniently not tell you before you adopted or relinquished your child? There are so many things, but I'll try to keep them at 10.
- I wish that someone had told me how frightened I would feel about having a brand new baby at home. Every other mother I knew seemed so at ease and happy. I just figured that I was going to be a terrible mother from the get-go; that all my IF problems and miscarriages meant that I was going to be a horrible mother.
- I wish someone had warned me
Hello World! I’m New
Good morning! My name is Karen, and I'm one of the new bloggers at AdoptionBlogs.com. I'll be writing about open adoption and domestic infant adoption - specifically our adoption, but not only our experiences. First, though, a little bit about me and my family. My husband and I started looking at adoption after we had struggled with primary infertility. He had always talked about adopting, but then wanted to wait "until we had tried everything else". So we did. Just about everything else short of IVF. We had also talked about adopting an older child or a child with medical needs (I have some special ed. teaching credits, but also have been a bit reluctant to "bring my work home"). When we finally… [more]
Does The Learning Process Ever End?
Back when my husband and I adopted our first child, I think we were in the belief that adoption was an experience more than it was a process. We naively went along for awhile as if once the adoption was final, we could move on to the next stage in our family life and that would be that. Of course we had openness and contact with several of our oldest daughter’s birthfamily members, but we assumed that the issues inherent to adoption, were also mostly dispensed with when the adoption was finalized. Boy did we have so much to learn!
With many years, and the addition of two other children, also through open adoptions, we have come to understand that adoption IS in fact a process… [more]










