Story/Article/Essay

On Sunday morning my husband mentioned he’d seen an interesting piece in the morning paper—“Embryo Adoption Plants a Complex Family Tree”—and he asked me to read it because he wanted to know my thoughts. The article tells the story of Pat and Jen McLaughiln, a couple from Missouri who used embryos donated by another couple in California to give birth to twin girls. Instead of the anonymous process more common in embryo donation (also sometimes called embryo adoption), the McLaughlins and their donors are approaching their situation more like an open adoption. The McLaughlins have five other children, four adopted from Russian orphanages and one adopted in their home state. According to the article, McLaughlin has never shied away from knowing her adopted children’s pasts. She and her husband, a lawyer, had… [more]

In my last post, I shared bits and pieces of an interview with birthmom and author, Patricia Dischler. Patricia previously shared her experience with her semi open adoption that turned into an open adoption when her son was twelve. Like any situation, there are positives and negatives involved. For Patricia, the positives to her situation were that she never really felt like she was saying goodbye to her son. She made the decision to place him for adoption because she wanted him to have the family and life that she felt he deserved. On the other hand though, it was extremely hard and painful to follow through on. Those last moments with him in the hospital, the first few days (or even months) afterwards, were… [more]

I recently had the opportunity to interview Patricia Dischler. Patricia is a birthmother and has written a book about her experience titled Because I Loved You. Patricia placed her son for adoption at age 21. However, her first instinct was to parent but during her pregnancy the birth father left town and Patricia had run into some problems with her business partner (she co-owned a printing company) and eventually decided that adoption would be the best option for her baby. All this put together lead me to see that my life did not support raising a child at that time in a way that I felt my child deserved, so I chose adoption. I do have to note though, that I would not have chosen… [more]

I recently stumbled upon an opinion piece regarding counseling in the Sun Sentinel that brings up the fact that counseling for birth parents doesn’t happen as often as it should “in real life.” The author begins by talking about the movie Juno, which is the story of a teenager who unexpectedly becomes pregnant and then goes on to place her baby for adoption. Although, it’s never stated in the article and I could be totally off base, by her words and tone I’d be willing to bet that the author of this opinion piece has some kind of personal connection to the adoption world. She discusses the fact that agency are often advertising “adoption planning” but really offer very little in the way of planning… [more]

I ran across an interesting article today out of California about a family who has three consecutive generations of adoption in a single family. Adam Pertman is quoted as saying “this doesn’t happen very often.” In the article, we are introduced to Mary Catt, her adult daughter, Anne Dawson, and Anne’s two year old son, Cooper. The article goes on to discuss the differences in the three adoptions. Mary, who is now 64, grew up in the closed adoption era and although she remembers always knowing that she was adopted, she also remembers her parents telling her not to talk about it and not to tell anyone that she was adopted. Occasionally she would ask her adoptive parents if they knew… [more]

I recently came across one of those “feel good” adoption stories in a Women’s Day magazine. Every now and then I need one of these positive stories. Writing about adoption and being an active member of the adoption community can be a tad overwhelming at times. I see a lot of the “hurt” that adoption causes amongst the birthmothers I talk with. So, sometimes I need to read one of those not too common “feel good” adoption stories and be reminded of the good. In this particular story, we are introduced to Eileen. In 1977, when Eileen was a teenager she met and fell in love with Paul, her high school sweetheart. Soon after, they found themselves in an unplanned pregnancy. They… [more]

Ahhhhhh, I am finally in Branson for the week! The view from our condo overlooking Table Rock Lake is nothing short of spectacular! After a late evening, dinner with friends, and a internet hookup downed due to a storm, I was unable to work on a post for today. I do have a post that I wrote some time ago, and it seemed worthy of sharing again, so I hope you will enjoy. I promise to be back with something new and refreshing, after I am awake and refreshed myself. ;) Of the many interesting adoption related resources online I recently came across an article written by Michael Colberg who works as an educator and therapist in the New York area. At his website… [more]

Recently, Heather refreshed the memory of her readers, by clearly sharing her core views about adoption. For those who might be a bit “hard of reading”, they were in bold so the point could be easily grasped. I was not surprised by anything there, her views have remained the same as they were years ago when she wrote a publication for the organization C.U.B., “What you should know if you are considering adoption for your baby”. At the time I first came across Heather’s well written publication, we were seeking to adopt a second child. For my husband and I, the information was valid, and well presented, and therefore something we chose to include in our profile packets for any mothers considering… [more]

Earlier, while relaxing for a few minutes, I was flipping through the new (July 2007) issue of Reader’s Digest when I stumbled upon a neat adoption story. Laurie Thompson was a sales supervisor in the advertising department of a radio station in Erie, Pennsylvania, when one of her frustrated sales reps, Missi Meeley, dropped by her office one afternoon. The conversation turned friendly and Missi mentioned that she was adopted. Missi had gotten used to people asking questions when she told them she was adopted and wasn’t surprised when Laurie asked if she had searched for her birthparents. Missi replied no and said she just hadn’t gotten around to it. Missi then relayed the little information that she did know… [more]

I came across an interesting article recently about a birth family and adoption family coming together for a quinceañera. You are probably wondering what a quinceañera is and until I read this article, I had no clue either. It’s a celebration in the Latin communities that celebrates a girl’s 15th birthday and her entrance into womanhood. It’s a coming of age type thing. This particular quinceañera highlighted in the article was for a beautiful dark haired girl named Carmen. Just like most big celebrations of any kind, this one took months of planning. But the planning wasn’t done by just one family, but two. Carmen’s birth and adoptive families came together to plan this celebration, which was very important to Carmen’s birthmother… [more]