“Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave.”

-Winnie the Pooh

I love that little Pooh, even if he is a “silly ole bear” he has a darn good grasp of one of the most important ingredients for living with in a positive open adoption, Trust.

While one objective of open adoption is to lessen the loss for those involved, that is just what it does, it does not make loss disappear. Openness in adoption also means adoptive parents bearing witness, often on a daily basis, to... more

Open adoptions are relationships and just like any other type of relationship they require work from all involved. Everyone must work together and communicate in order to have a healthy open adoption relationship.

In the beginning of most open adoption relationships, the child is too young to communicate so the communication is between the birthparents and the adoptive parents, so these tips were written with that in mind.

Be honest. If something the other person does or says makes you uncomfortable, politely say so. If you are having... more

If you had asked me ten years ago what open adoption was, I wouldn’t have had a real answer. I might could have guessed but I’d never guessed that I would be in the midst of one.

I knew a birthmother could receive pictures and updates on her child. In high school, a classmate had a baby and placed him for adoption and I remember her bringing in photos of him every so often. So I knew you could receive photos and updates and see your child grow in pictures. But visits?? I didn’t even know it was possible!! Luckily for me, A. (Charlie’s adoptive mom) knew all... more

Many hopeful adoptive parents rule out the option of open adoption before they begin. Often the fear of emotional challenges that could present themselves in an open adoption can appear overwhelming to them. While openness in an adoption might not ideally be possible for every situation, are there ways for more adoptive parents to truly consider it?

It is clear that there can be certain obvious benefits to a family of adoption when they have a positive, open relationship with birthparents. As with any new relationship, it can be a frightening... more

In a recent post, I told you all about Adoption.com’s 2007 Loved Photo Contest. If you are anything like me, you probably have a ton of photos!

What should you do with all of those photos? Well of course, there is scrapbooking but today I’d like to share a fun and new idea for a photo, a photo puzzle.

Photo puzzles are simple... more

Perhaps the confusion among the adoption opinions you will find is based in reality, after all everyone has their own unique view. I just have days when I find myself wondering which way to turn on some issues. I think I have figured out one basic thing though. When looking for solid advice and “how to” information to help you navigate the sometimes murky waters of adoption, it’s basically whatever you choose to believe. I have found that no matter what you latch onto, what advice you choose to follow, you will conflict with someone, at some point,... more

If you’d asked me six or seven years ago what open adoption was, I would have had no clue. I might have had an idea but knowing what I know now, that idea would have been far off base. I would have probably just said that open adoption would allow a birthmother to receive pictures of her child for a few years.

When I was in high school there was a girl who got pregnant and placed her baby for adoption through a local Christian adoption agency. I remember her bringing pictures of her son’s first birthday that the adoptive parents had sent her, so I knew you could... more

Once you have welcomed home your new child, taken some time to attach and adjust and begun the process of emailing, calling and sending photos to his or her birthmother, you may decide the time is optimum for a first visit.

Depending on where everyone is in their comfort level with that first visit you might select a public, family friendly place like a park, restaurant or a museum. Getting together in such a location can help take some of the pressure off... more

When parents are bringing a new baby home it is a magical time for any family. With a family formed by way of adoption that fascination and joy over meeting your new child is no different. You have been through all the paperwork and the homestudy, the social workers and the seemingly endless waiting to begin your family, and you survived. It is only natural that once your child is in your arms you are eager to start your life together!

If you have made an open adoption agreement with your child’s birthparents, this is also a time to begin the journey... more

Being in an open adoption means sharing information right?

For those of us who are involved with birthparents and extended birthfamily and are generally very open about adoption it can still be difficult to know when it is acceptable to share information about our child’s birthparents with others. When you think about how your child and child’s birthparents might be impacted by what gets shared and with whom, you may find yourself reserving some information just for your immediate family. There is nothing inherently wrong with... more