Ok, one of the stories going around the web for the last week or so, is concerning a Minnesota couple who has decided to use what the articles term as “billboards” to get the word out that they are interested in adopting a baby.

Tom and Claire Halverson, after waiting for over three years to locate a newborn available for adoption, decided to post 3feet by 4feet homemade signs ( billboards?) along the route they travel to the craft fairs... more

Continued from Part Two

The transracial couple I knew of did everything to prepare for the possibility of adopting and very quickly, so what went wrong? Well suddenly after the birth of the baby they were told that the mother had changed her mind about placement and would be parenting. They were disappointed, but that happens and they understood. It was only later when speaking to the mutual friend (the one who was going to be the foster... more

Continued form Part One

The referral director was cold in tone when she explained that the birth mother had selected another family. How could that be? It was odd that the referral director called us at precisely the time that the potential birthmom had agreed to call me, or was it? Honestly we had many irons in the fire to locate a situation so we put this aside and forged forward and with good results. We located our second daughter’s... more

You can hear a lot lately in the world of adoption about women, many not even expectant mothers at all, posing as potential birthparents in order to scam hopeful adoptive couples. You might even have heard about adoptive couples who scam young women posing as prepared and screened when they are in fact not approved for adoption and want to conduct matters under the radar of proper adoption laws. How much however have you heard about adoption agencies and other seeming “professionals” becoming the actual scam artists? While there do not appear to be many... more

I wish I had a perky post ready for today, but that just is not the way my life is currently going. My four year old has been pushing me near the brink today and right now I feel very, very alone.

A few months back we finally, after almost two years of struggling, took her to a therapist and Reactive Attachment Disorder was brought up. I had always felt that children who suffered from this were mainly those who had lived deprived of early attention in an overseas orphanage, or even severely abused children in our own foster... more

Is that even possible? I know we spend a ton of time reminding people (and rightly so) that most birthparents really DO care about the child they placed, even when they cannot bring themselves to visit or stay in contact. This “staying away” comes out of the pain and renewal of their grief every time they have to again leave a visit, and without their child. This is something most adoptive parents truly have understanding and empathy for. Everyday I talk to someone who sends letters and pictures out... more

Part One

Today part two of the Dr. Phil show’s episode tagged “Adoption Scams” aired.

As I observed with the first half of the show yesterday, things went fairly well without a lot of the negative adoption stereotypes I was gritting my teeth waiting to encounter. The show continued where they left off in Thursday’s episode, focusing on three hopeful adoptive moms who were trying to confront “Melissa." The woman Melissa had posed to them as a pregnant mother... more

Today the Dr. Phil show began a two part series on “Adoption Scams.”

I admit that I had my glass of tea in hand, my sofa cushion fluffed and was ready to watch and see where exactly he was going with this one. Other recent shows (Dateline, Montel) have done a poor job of the topic and sensationalized an already misunderstood problem. I even cut a phone conversation with my mother in law short because she called in the middle of the program (she had to tell me she had just set her... more

I admit I do not care for all the safe haven laws that have become a new trend. These laws supposedly encourage young women not to harm their newborns and abandon them at a facility like a hospital or fire station, without fear of legal action against them. In the long run though a child might be abandoned by someone other than the mother and without her permission. Children abandoned in this way also lose the ability to in the future search for birth family and know their history. I understand the thought process is to somehow save lives, but this... more

I want to tell you about L and W.

They adopted a newborn A, several years ago from a young mother M who had many harsh issues in her life. There was a long history of mental illness, drug use, abuse, violence, prostitution, homelessness and inevitably incarceration.

L and W held high hopes for M, they wanted her to recover and be an active part of her child A’s life. They wanted a very open adoption. In the early years they stayed in close contact with M’s family. They sent information through them to M about A, all... more