I can understand the reasoning behind the belief that reoccurring times such as birthdays and placement anniversaries can be a traumatic time for those who were adopted. It also happens to those of us who have suffered any deeply emotional loss, even the death of a child. What you will find is that this “feeling” of loss sort of goes into hibernation after a long initial period of grieving, but it still lies just under the surface and can show up in some interesting ways.

Many years I have just had what I somehow thought was an extreme “bad day” without... more

Well the most basic conclusion that could be drawn from the heading is that Yes, adoption means JOY for adopting parents and that is most of what I too hear from other members of the triad. As an adoptive parent I must only know complete joy about adoption, after all I am a parent because of adoption, therefore adoption=joy for me. That is what I too believed, before I actually... more

Easter is one of the most monumental times of the year for believers. Because of the emptiness of a long ago burial tomb our lives can hold hope for a full and forever future. The greatest gift ever was in the form of an “empty” Easter morning.

Our family celebrates like many others. We went to church, followed by the egg hunts both there and at the home of grandparents, but through out the day I found myself falling into a different kind of empty feeling. Looking at my children I could not help but think of what their birthfamilies have... more

A recent post by Coley mentions an email from a birthmother struggling with how to process the diagnosis of her daughter’s adoptive mother with cancer. Coley offers some great tips on dealing with this shock and also how to support the family as they go through such a difficult time. Of course prayer is a positive and reminds those who are experiencing this that there is always HOPE for recovery.

Adoptive families in open relationships can be affected... more