On Thanksgiving, which also happens to be Love Thursday, it seems only appropriate to discuss the many things I’m thankful for. It’s actually probably too many to list or you’d still be reading instead of Black Friday shopping tomorrow! (If you are that brave!) First and foremost, I’m thankful for God, for without him my life wouldn’t be what it is. I’m blessed on a daily basis by God’s love and can’t imagine not having that in my life.

Secondly, I’m thankful for my family, however, my definition of family might be somewhat different from the next person’s. My family... more

I attempted to get up and write this before anyone in my household was up (and all over me) but with no luck. The kids are up and excited about the day. The Macy’s Thanksgiving day parade is on, and we are getting ready to go somewhere else for our turkey dinner. Going somewhere else means no leftovers here at our house. I don’t like that part.

I love leftovers from Thanksgiving! I always thought it was the most fun making all the little turkey sandwiches, turkey salad, turkey with noodles, turkey pot pie, turkey pizza, turkey and... more

In my last post, I wrote about using the Thanksgiving season to jumpstart a gratitude journal. While we are being grateful, why not show a little appreciation to the people who helped and supported us during our adoption journey?

I’m sure there are obvious people who supported you during your adoption journey, perhaps they are family members, close friends, or your significant other, but what about someone else who went out of their way to be kind to your during your time of grief and their kind words,... more

Since Thanksgiving is this week (ack, where did time go?) I will be doing a few posts related to this holiday in the days that lead up to Thanksgiving.

This Thanksgiving season, be sure and give thanks for your child and let him or her know that you are thankful for them. I’m sure that your child probably knows that he or she is very loved by you, but go out of your way to do so in honor of the holiday. If you have waited too late to send something specifically to or for your child, you could do something in honor of them.

Send your child a card or an e-card... more

My co-blogger Coley has recently touched on how difficult yet rewarding birthday visits can be from the perspective of a birth/first parent. Events like holidays, but most especially the birthday of their child, can be very emotional times for birthparents. Coley shared some really great tips that could help both birth and adoptive families to better prepare themselves for visits during all the excitement of your... more

I know that many discussions have occurred online about family preservation. The main feeling behind this is terminology that no child should be separated from their family of origin if they can be safely be cared for there, and whose parent (or parents) wish to raise them. I can’t argue with that belief under that context. If parents what to parent, and there is no evidence that a child might be abused or neglected, he or she should not be placed for adoption. No one who is capable, and not at risk to be abusive, should be forced to place a child. I think most... more

In my last post, I wrote about how the fourth of July once again has me missing my birth son. This holiday has reminded me of my loss of motherhood and the things that I am missing and am not doing with Charlie.

However, there are some things that I can do to cope. Others may be experiencing some holiday blues as well, so I will share my ideas with you.

Send your child a card. Yes, a fourth of July card might be a little cheesy, but it’s a great surprise... more

During my pregnancy, I suspected as a birthmother big holidays (Christmas, Mother’s Day, and my son’s birthday) would be hard to deal with and would be emotional for me. I suspected that the holidays would make me think of Charlie and my loss of motherhood to him and I was correct. Christmas, Mother’s Day and his birthday are all difficult days.

What I didn’t suspect was that the smaller holidays (4th of July, Halloween to name a few) would be emotional as well. But one day before the 4th of July, I find myself in a little funk and thinking of Charlie.

Growing... more

For every man out there who has touched the life of a child, and changed it in some positive way forever, today is definitely your day. There is so much more to the meaning of the word Father than most of us consider, and more than a few fellows who qualify for the honored title, but who may not even realize it.

For myself, if I were far better at sending cards and sentiments (ok I am a poor mailer of paper goods), there would be no shortage of guys to get my congrats on this hallowed occasion. Sadly... more

Before Mother’s Day, I could have probably written a thousand posts regarding Mother’s Day and the issues that birthmothers face as a result of Mother’s Day. But it’s much harder with me for Father’s Day.

Charlie’s birth dad is not and has never been involved in our lives since the day I told him I was pregnant, so I don’t have first hand experience watching a birth father deal with the issues that they face, although, I know and realize that they are important to the child’s well being whether they are in the picture or not.

So, I want to take... more